What does “Reflecting on the future” mean to you? To say that one is hitting the road again, venturing out, leaving the nest, or taking off, implies that one is inevitably leaving a place behind. I‘m not one to constantly look back – I’m a forward-thinking woman – but the purpose of blogging IS to be reflective. So here it goes.
To reflect on what we are leaving behind now is not as scary as it was six years ago. Then, we left everything and everyone behind, with no destination or purpose other than to explore and wander.
This time, we have a purpose, a plan, and multiple destinations in mind. I know what to expect more than I did then. I am not nervous for the journey.
I’m just mindful of the time.
What we are leaving behind now is the life we’ve built the past five years. A steady routine of work, friends, schedules, and dates scribbled in a calendar of time off to visit the boys.
I’m leaving behind the pattern of my life for this new span of time called “retirement”.
There are a lot of unknowns in this new pattern we are weaving. And that is exciting. But there is an overwhelming sense of something that keeps cropping up in my head. This nagging sense of time – too much or too little?
I have the sense of time as it relates to the next 20 years (more or less) laid bare in front of me, like a long winding road that I will be traveling down one last time (but never alone – thanks Gary). I have the urge to hurry up and get it all in, savoring every opportunity. I feel pushed to pack in as much of everything.
I want to feel the possible.
As someone not so wise liked to repeat often, the passage of time is an interesting concept. Time can go by slowly, and often, there’s not enough of it. We either find ourselves with too much time on our hands or we feel rushed and hurried and stressed because of it.
But life on the road, however, makes time take on a whole new perspective.
I’m looking forward to the next few months of the slower pace and calmer mornings. That second cup of coffee (decaf) and completion of all my NYT puzzles.
My days won’t be dictated by a clock on the wall or the buzzing of my phone. No appointments or meetings or necessary activities.
I won’t be expected or needed as much. I won’t be delayed or distracted. I’ll probably still get annoyed, but who doesn’t get annoyed trying to navigate in traffic.
Perhaps this retirement thing comes at the perfect age when you simultaneously really need it as well as truly appreciate it. Life on the road will bring me, hopefully, to the best time of my life.